Will Mr. O’Leary learn how to woo Linda?

The Owl Branch Book Promotions

Karen holmes in america with conversation.jpgline-8Karen holmes in america

You can find “Holmes In America”
(A Sherlock/Holmes Mystery #1)
by Karen Vaughan at:

Amazon – FREE on Kindle Unlimited

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SNAFU FUBAR: NOTHING HEROIC BY BOB DIXON

THE REVIEW

I laughed so hard I cried! I will say right off the bat there is a warning that should be applied while reading this book. Readers should, no not should, must wear adult diapers to prevent an unfortunate accident while laughing. Snafu FUBAR will also cause uncontrolled snorting due to the hilarity of the book.  Yes it’s that funny! When I spoke to the author, he said his only goal in writing this book was to entertain his audience. I have to say he succeeded. The characters in this book are caricatures of every bad ass criminal wannabe and erstwhile bumbling superheroes who suck miserably at the job.  Mr. Dixon has written an irreverent novel.  I usually don’t like clichéd characters and plots but it works in this case.  I will happily give Mr. Dixon five dancing Snoopy’s for great book. If you are looking for a hidden message, there isn’t one. Just have fun with this hilarious read.

14222273_10153838796080108_6356647686174084693_nABOUT THE AUTHOR

 

Bob Dixon is a two-time Guinness World Record holder for the World’s Longest Cartoon Strip. He is the author and creator of a number of comic book titles for Pocket Change Comics, including Assassinette: The Mind Stalker, Psyco Duck, Jester’s Dead, The Holy Knight, Riplash, Shadow Slasher, and Warzone 3719. Bob has written two children books, Rooty the Tree Troll and Holiday Bunny; two young adult books, Mouch and Company: The Dream Psychic and Rags and Ruins; An adult humor book Snafu Fubar : Nothing Heroic; and is the co-author of Will Jones’ biography A Tough Call. Bob is also the Writer/Director of the movie Dr. Prozak’s Office. Additionally, he is a certified special education teacher who works with children who have autism and intellectual delays.

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LITERARY PUT DOWNS THROUGH THE AGES PART I

Whether it be the Bard or Hemingway, insults have peppered literature for centuries.  The are the comic relief in a heavy tragedy or a deep philosophical read.  For the next few blogs I am going to explore the literary quips from the classics to Shakespeare.  I may even delve into some salvos from independent authors.

Let’s get started and have some fun with literary put-downs

 

“All morons hate it when you call them a moron.”
—Holden Caulfield in The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger. So you’ve questioned someone’s intelligence, and now they’re irate. What better way to drive your argument home?

 

 

Product Details “And she’s got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.”
—Sally Nicholas in The Adventures of Sally by P.G. Wodehouse. Kill two birds with one stone: let him know he’s not up to par romantically or intellectually.

 

Product Details“The man is as useless as nipples on a breastplate.”
—Cersei Lannister in A Feast For Crows by George R.R. Martin. This is how they say “you ain’t all that and a bag of chips” in the Seven Kingdoms.

 

“I never saw anybody take so long to dress, and with such little result.”
—Algernon Moncrieff in The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde. Perfect for someone who’s got about as much sense of style as that of punctuality.

 

“Don’t try to deconstruct it, Carol — it’s a phenomenon too abstract for your thought process — it’s called humor.”
—Phyllis Riggs in Central Park West by Woody Allen. The expert glove slap for the comedically challenged.

 

 

 

A FEW FROM THE BARD

The Taming of the Shrew (Act 3, Scene 3)

“Away, you three-inch fool! “

 

Shakespeare insult 24: King Lear (Act 2, Scene 2)

“Thou art a boil, a plague sore”

 

Shakespeare insult 37: Troilus and Cressida (Act 2, Scene 1)

“Thou sodden-witted lord! Thou hast no more brain than I have in mine elbows “

 

 

When wishing to end a dull or obnoxious conversation
“In my mind, Martha, you are buried in cement right up to your neck. No … Right up to your nose … That’s much quieter.”
—George in Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? by Edward Albee. Perfect for hitting the mute button on the constant raconteur.

And finally, when being shamelessly provocative
“Come and get one in the yarbles, if you have any yarbles, you eunuch jelly thou.”
—Alex in A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess. I mean, really, any excuse to say “eunuch jelly thou,” am I right?

REFERENCES

http://www.irishexaminer.com/ireland/top-10-greatest-insults-in-literature-270680.html

https://www.theguardian.com/books/booksblog/gallery/2014/jun/02/-12-literary-insults-to-make-you-weep

http://airshipdaily.com/blog/24-literary-insults-for-every-occasion-austen-to-sedaris

http://www.nosweatshakespeare.com/resources/shakespeare-insults/

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STARK SEPTEMBER BY CD BRADLEY BOOK 1 OF THE STARK TRILOGY

51GYpLORx4L (1)  Sometimes it only takes a moment for your whole world to change. When Captain Kira Riley begins working on base at Fort Carson, she thinks she will be paying back her debt and escape her past. However just as she tries to focus on the mission at hand her path violently collides with the one man who could unearth every wall she has ever built. Kira had struggled for years to make it to this moment. Finally a physician! But for those from meager backgrounds dreams come at a price. In order to pay for school she would have to serve in the military for 4 years. Just being on base brings back a lifetime of painful memories. Kira has to focus, pull up her big girl panties and make this work. One problem, she never anticipated meeting Owen Stark, a Special Forces sergeant who lives by a strict code. Though Kira tries to avoid any thoughts of this rugged stranger, fate has other plans. After a steamy and awkward physical exam, Kira is left breathless and shaken. She has no intention of ever putting herself in a vulnerable situation again yet this soldier stirs feelings she didn’t know she had. Beyond fraternization, Kira will have to overcome; a slew of crazy exes, the grips of a BDSM subculture, and jail to find out who Owen Stark really is. Stark is intrigued from their first encounter but his world is set. After a decade of service to avenge past tragedy, his team was all he needed, until he met her. Her determination, wit, and gentle charm captivate him. Now he must choose between the existence he has built and a chance to really live again. Separated by their ranks she is the one woman he can never have. He knows being caught will end both of their careers. Aside from that if he gets too close she will learn about his life before the military or worse how he has spent his free time for the last decade. He knows he should just walk away, but one look in those innocent eyes and the world stops spinning. Some risks are worth taking even if you lose everything.

A REVIEW 

HOT! HOT!! HOT!!!, September 18, 2016
By 
 
Verified Purchase(What’s this?)
This review is from Stark September (Stark Trilogy Book 1) (Kindle Edition)
Last night I finished Stark September by C.D. Bradley. Talk about Hot, Hot, Hot!!!! This one will make clothing implode. I couldn’t put it down and had it finished in one day!
Stark September is a story about Kira Riley, a former military brat who has just embarked on her own military career as an officer and a doctor. Her first day in the clinic she is assigned to give a post-mission physical to the same man she literally ran into earlier in the morning. Owen Stark is a Sergeant in the Army and also a Special Forces soldier. He knows he can’t have a relationship with the hot doc giving him his physical but the attraction is strong, too strong to resist. The attraction between the Captain and the Sergeant is more prevalent than the rules they are both governed by and the relation quickly turns hot and heavy. They both have pasts they are running from but events keep throwing the past in their faces and threaten to pull them apart, and having to keep their relationship secret from the military just makes things even more forbidden and more dangerous.
This novel is a cliff-hanger but I do believe the second novel is releasing soon, at least I certainly hope that is will be releasing soon, and there will be a third novel. I will have my hands all over the second novel as soon as it is released. Another warning, there is some BDSM involved in this novel but not enough to put anyone off. There is just enough, I believe, to satisfy the BDSM fans but not so much to turn off the fans who are not.

AVAILABLE AT AMAZON

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TIME TO HEAT THINGS UP WITH SUMMER SIN, A ROMANCE BY DARLENE KUNCYTES

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Summer Sin

(The Anthology Novella Series Book 2)

Sinfully Sexy!! Book 2 in The Anthology Novella Series will have you begging for more!

Victoria Remington is one of the best supernatural hunters that an elite team of special forces has. But, there seems to be a slight problem. She now has a price on her head. And, it just so happens to be a price offered by the very Demon who killed her parents so many years ago.

Determined to protect her at all cost, her superior forces her to take a leave of absence and just lay low for a little while…which makes for a very ticked off hunter.
Part Were and part Fey, this beautiful force of nature is deadly on a good day. Imagine what she’s like when she’s angry!

Camden Stark retired from the same team that Victoria now works for when he was nearly killed by the same Demon who now wants Victoria dead. Having a favor called in on him, Camden is asked to keep an eye on the stunning hybrid to make sure that she’s kept safe. But the question of the day is… is he?

From the moment that these two lay eyes on each other it’s like the 4th of July and the sparks fly. Two strong fighters thrown together on a tropical island for an entire month. Sound like paradise? Not even close.

Join this pair as they spar and argue and maybe…just maybe, find that sometimes what you’ve been looking for your entire life can be right next door…and you didn’t even know it.

From romance author, Darlene Kuncytes comes book 2 in The Anthology Novella Series! Summer Sin!
A complete short story of Paranormal Romance!
Lose yourself and fall completely, totally in love! Romance, heat…laugh out loud fun!
**These are short paranormal romances intended for mature readers. Enjoy! **

A RAVE REVIEW

Failed to Disappoint., August 8, 2016
Verified Purchase(What’s this?)
This review is from Summer Sin (The Anthology Novella Series Book 2) (Kindle Edition)
Again this author failed to disappoint me! Victoria and Camden are a spectacular couple. After reading this short story in one sitting. I had to say I am very pleased with the way it turned out. Characters were so well developed like all of Darlene’s are. Editing was more that superb and of course the story line never disappoints with holding my interest from the very beginning to the very end. This were/fae being is intriguing, to say the least. I like where the author took this and look forward to many more books from this wonderful writer. I recommend you read this book for yourself. You cannot determine the feelings this book will evoke in you until you have read it.

GET YOUR SUMMER SIN AT AMAZON

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THE CONCLUSION WE HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR STARK RESOLUTION BY CD BRADLEY

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Actions have consequences. In the blink of an eye everything, you have held dear, everything you have taken for granted… can vanish.
Lub dub … Lub dub… when you are taking out a target at 800 meters every part of your body slows. Complete control is mandatory. Muscle memory takes over. Action and reaction are instinctual. But what if something is off? The little voice in your head screaming STOP!
The moment Owen Stark’s finger squeezed the trigger all hell broke loose. The deadly round traveled at 2,550 feet per second straight into his target. As she fell, her identity became as evident as the growing crimson stain on her chest. The world fell silent. Despite the chaos around him, Stark could hear nothing but the pounding of his heart and the screaming inside his head. For the love of God woman, please GET UP! He begged over and over, but the blue heap of fabric that shrouded Kira Riley did not move.
All his training, everything he had spent the last decade preparing for came down to this moment. Faced with desperate circumstances, Owen Stark must make the impossible choice between the safety of his team and the chance to save the love of his life. When the last tear has fallen, and those lost are laid to rest, will he be able to open his heart and live again, or will the nightmares drag him to an unthinkable resolution?
Sometimes, when the sacrifice is too great to bear, Love finds a way to bring you home.

SAVE THE DATE FOR THE AWESOME STARK RESOLUTION RELEASE PARTY

 

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DARKNESS IS RISING…CAN IT BE PREVENTED DARKNESS RISING BY C.TUTTLE

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DARKNESS RISING

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